What to do ?

I so really want to Quit !!

Quit my job and be SAHM ! With the new 'cam tak kuaser' nyer maid, I am not so happy with the way she run the house and treat my baby... but being me, cam tak sampai ati nak tegor or marah or send her off !!

In seven months she's with me... the electricity & water bills goes higher ! The groceries and home cleaning products kejap2 abes !! .. she hv no sympathy towards us spending $$$$ ! The light, the fan, the radio, the tv.. she kept on running, she do laundry several times a day.. even for 3-4 clothings !! The extra food - she threw ! The water she wasted ! Her shower - 1 hour, 2 or 3 times a day ! Not mentioning her constant in & out of the toilets several times a day ... She naps very very often and she MUST hv her afternoon naps. She has broken several of my plates, my glasses, couple of my Raya dresses already stained from her washing ! My baby had fell, burned his finger...etc... She argued when we tell, she laughs when she's done something wrong, she sulked when she's not happy.. She don't bother to offer help when sees me 'doing' work !

With all these.. I still tell my hb, it's ok... she's ok, but hv a bit of attitude ! One thing is, she can do the work (but hv to be told)...

But this !! Oh my !! Now I am not at ease going to work....

One night, we had told Katkoot we r going Hari Raya visits, but I was tired and decided not to. Katkoot was later so excited telling her..

He : "Bibib (bibik).. Zed go Ari Raya visit... go Ari Raya visit"...

She : "No, Zed stay home... sleep"

He : "No Bibib, Zed go Ari Raya visit !"

Then I told hb that we hv to bring him out, even for awhile coz he was so excited to go out already... we decided to go to Simpang Bedok for teh tarik and prata. So I told her to change him while I myself get changed. Then Katkoot came running out in his pampers... crying. I asked why ?

He : "Bibib say Zed go sleep".

I went in to tell her that we are going to bring him out, that's why I told her to change him... *she laughs*...

Me : "Zed change ya... we go out ya Habibi..."

She : "No ! Zed go sleep with bibik..."

He : "No Bibib ! Zed go out mama, baba... Zed go Ari Raya visit"

She : "No, Zed go sleep"

He : "No !! No, Zed go !!" (crying)

*She laughs*

I was so frustrated at this time ! Here I am trying to instill good manners to my baby and here she goes intimidating & irritating him !!! She takes joy in seeing this boy shouting and crying !! What's happening here ?????????? What is she teaching my baby while I am away at work ?? Is she setting bad examples for him to pick up ?? Even with this, I tried to be nice to her..

Me : "Kamu jagan kasi dia marah.. saya tak suka tau kamu kasi dia geram bergini. Saya sudah janji mau bawak dia keluar... jangan kasi dia nangis !"

*She smile & laughs*

There's more & more of her frustrating behaviour, everyday !...

Tell me what to do !! Every time I think about it, I felt like sending her back... but everytime I look at her... I tak sampai ati...... *sigh*

Today, katkoot woke up while I was dressing up to work... he cried, hangging to me "Mama don't go work"... what to do, I hv so many things to clear at work, so busy !!

"Ya Rabb.. lindungilah rumah dan keluarga ku... Ameen"